The morning of Eid in my household, whether it’s Eid ul Fitr or Eid al Adha, is a volcanic eruption.
You have to wake up before sunrise.
You also have to take a shower, dress up really nice and, in the case of Eid al-Adha, you should refrain from eating anything before you go to prayer.
If it were just me that I had to worry about, this wouldn’t be a problem. But, given that there are four of us, the phrase “herding cats” comes to mind.
It’s all…
“You get Y. ready., I’ll get N.”
“No, you feed him… ugh, stop pulling on my shirt, what do you want?!”
“Do you have the cash for Saddaqa… seriously, you mean we have to stop by the BANK?!!!”
“No, you CANNOT wear your Cinderella dress up outfit to Eid prayer!”
“WAHFO, WHAAAAFOE… ANA WAHFOO…ANA DADOOO!! (Translation: Waffles, waffles, I want waflles … and I want to nurse!!)
“WHAT do you MEAN you haven’t taken a shower, yet? When am I going to take a shower, then?!”
“It’s Eid… I WANT CANDAAAAAAY FOR BREAKFAST PUHLEEEEZ! ”
“I HAVE the diaper bag AND the clothes we’re wearing tonight, we’ll just have to get ready at mom’s place and then come back here… yes, I did tell you about that party…did you put snacks in there… I know N., the graham crackers aren’t FOR YOU…”
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining. It’s just that amidst that tornado of preparation, I’m not really thinking about Eid.
I’m thinking about getting to Eid prayers, going to my mom’s place afterward, and then how I’m going to blow dry my hair before we start making evening rounds of our friend’s places.
But this is how we do it. This is how everyone does it, I guess. This is how it is done.
Unless Allah blesses you with an upper respiratory infection.
You should know that attendance of Eid prayers is mandatory. There is scholarly discussion of whether it’s obligatory for women, but I, personally, treat it as an obligation.
However, there are exemptions. For example, when you are sick. And your children are sick.
I’m a very civic minded sick person. I don’t go ANYWHERE when I or my children are sick.
Given the fact that Muslims greet each other by hugging and kissing each other, I thought it best to stay home with the kids and thereby save the Muslim community in Central Florida from having an epidemic of the worst.cold.ever.
I woke up on Tuesday morning to find that my husband had already left for Eid prayer. I called him and found out that since we weren’t “really going to be doing anything today,” he had decided to go straight to work.
If you’re reading this and you’re not Muslim, I ask you to substitute your own religious equivalent into this situation. It’s like this, “Since everyone is sick, I’m just going to go to [religious place of communal gathering] and then I’m going to work.”
Don’t get the point? Okay, how’s this… “I’m going to work. On Christmas.”
That? Is incredibly depressing.
As soon as I hung up the phone, I decided… today is NOT going to be another Tuesday.
Today is Eid al Adha.
TODAY IS EID AL ADHA AND IT WILL BE SPECIAL.
So, I woke the kids up, yelling, “Eid Mubarak!! It’s Eid, can you believe it? IT.IS.EID!!!”
This, as I mentioned, is a significant change from, “Wake up, WAKE UP…we’re going to be late, we have to get to salaat… hurry…oh, oh, yes, ::quick hug:: Eid Mubarak… go brush your teeth…”
Y. was ecstatic, because he doesn’t have a clue and pretty much yelling about anything makes him giggle, but I saw N.’s eyes sparkle in a way that they haven’t on any previous Eid.
Even the one when we bought her a bicycle and a golf set. She was excited. Very excited.
“How to Make Eid Special When You’re Too Sick To Go To Prayer and Participate In the Tornado of Socialization that Follows”
First on the agenda, explain the meaning and reason for Eid al Adha, the Festival of the Sacrifice.
Eid Al Adha signifies the end of Hajj and Abraham's willingness to sacrifice for Allah.
Yes. I do realize that those silver balls hanging are supposed to be Christmas decorations. However, I will only cease and desist their use when someone offers an adequate explanation of how tacky silver spheres are connected to the birth of Jesus. Until then, they are pretty, fun, and festive. And since Eid is a festival, I’m using them. Also, you may notice that I wrote “Eid Mubarek” instead of “Eid Mubarak”. Really, you can spell it either way. Mostly, my assertion is based on the notion that I didn’t feel like starting over.
If a person were to take a quick look at most national flags of Muslim countries, they would notice that green and white are big themes. So, our decor was highly informed by that.
You have to eat something sweet on Eid, too. It’s, like, a RULE.
(In addition to green and white, N. has introduced "lavender" (NOT purple) among our family Eid colors.)
And, hello, PRESENTS!!
I got him Avatar. Because I am awesome. And also havent seen it, yet.
Then, after dinner, we read a story about the Prophet Abraham (pbuh*). Not the PG-13 story when Allah commands him to sacrifice his son, but another one that is more PG rated that emphasizes the commitment to Islamic monotheism. Because, personally, I think my five year old isn’t ready for the whole story, and I don’t want her freaking out if I mention a trip to the mountains in the next few months.
****
Eid is a day of blessing for Muslims.
It’s a day when we should enjoy ourselves and foster gratitude for those blessings. I think I’d forgotten that. It’s quite possible, in fact, up until a few days ago, I had only understood that in my brain. I hadn’t understood that with my whole heart. This is another one of those moments when I feel blessed to have been born in America. So much of the practice of tradition has the potential to rely on concerted and conscious effort here… we’re given the opportunity to reinvent tradition in ways that can resonate more clearly with the actual values behind the practice.
Whether it’s Eid, Christmas, Diwali, Hanukkah or other special days… the reasons for our celebrations contain the wisdom of ages and the values we hold dear. The true blessings of these days occur when we can actually identify what we’re choosing to transmit to those who will carry them on.
Being part of a community of worshipers is an integral part of being a Muslim, and of course my kids and family will always, God willing, attend Eid prayers and go to the parties afterward. In the future, though, we’re going to take time to… well, to breathe in the blessings that God has given us.
Religious holidays are more than parties and candy and toys… they are blessings.
Let’s stop and close our eyes as these days unfold and truly experience their blessings.
Let’s celebrate with more than just our deeds, let’s celebrate with our hearts and our pure intentions.
It’s not just enough to teach my kids about Eid. I will teach them what it means, why they’re lucky to have it, why it’s important… and, most of all, how they can do more than just observe it…
We will teach them, how they can, truly and with all their hearts, learn to love it.
This is my baby. This is my baby after three cupcakes. Eid Mubarak, everyone. 
Photos were taken with my husband’s Motorola Droid which is the only camera we had available at the time.
*”pbuh” is the suffix that Muslims add when speaking of Allah’s Messengers and Prophets. It means “Peace be upon him.”
P.S. There is no way I’m spell checking this post.
Oh I love this post. I so do relate as we look forward to celebrating our own (probably SHOULD be but we don’t go to church even though I wish we could find the “right” one) religious traditions. And the whole “you better be happy because it’s [insert holiday here], dammit!” thing. I get so SO stressed out with making ours the way it MUST be and HAS to be. Because don’t hassle me, I’m upholding generational traditions and making lifetime memories for crying out loud!!! Bah! No one ever told me the holidays were like a full-time, graveyard shift gig for parents that you pay someone else (Target owns me) to do.
Happy Eid to you and your family!!! XO
(Oh and “inshallah”? You just made me miss my mom so much. She used to say that ALL the time.)
@Caroline, Your mom used to say that all the time… that is so.. beautiful. I’m glad you enjoyed the post and that it resonated with you.
@Faiqa, For you… resonated for you? You know what I mean…
Faiqa -
I would like to extend you and my sweet neighbors accross the street, a Happy Eid al Adha, but I am completely oblivious as the proper way to do so.
Please tell me how a non Muslim girl, like myself, could best express fond wishes for this special day to Muslim friends.
@Annabelle, “Eid Mubarak”. Thanks for being thoughtful enough to ask.
Eid Mubarak, Faiqa and family!!!!!!!
That’s an awesome substitute for the full outside-of-home celebration.
@Poppy, Thanks!
OK, those are some cute kids you’ve got there.
And? Your first morning of Eid sounds strangely like Christmas mornings when I was a kid: you want to open presents and celebrate with candy but you also have to get dressed and ready for mass, and plan the whole day out for what family you’re seeing when.
@SciFi Dad, They are pretty cute… that’s why we decided to keep them.
A joyous celebration indeed! Best of the season to you all!
@Dave2, Thanks…
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Morningsidemom, Faiqa. Faiqa said: Native Born: Eid Blessings: Why Upper Respiratory Infections Are A Gift From God http://bit.ly/cLUDaC [...]
Can I just wish you a Merry Muslim Christmas instead? Much easier for me…
I know all too well the notion of deciding whether or not I would be going to work on some of the Jewish holidays — especially those which include the Yizkor prayer, which is one said in memory of loved ones who have passed away. There are times that I would simply go to work, take two hours of leave, head to a local synagogue (not my own) for the service, and then head back.
As for teaching N about the narrative regarding Abraham and the sacrifice of his son — Our second grader just learned most of the details of the story this year. Which has given him implicit reason never to trust me ever again.
@shiny, Yes, the “not my own” thing happens sometimes with us, too.
Beautiful post. And pictures.
I love celebrating our holidays with my boys now, and teaching them about the importance of Easter, and Christmas. Having children makes everything that much more special, you know?
@Loukia, You’re right, for me, having children makes everything feel a lot more important and meaningful.
Eid Mubarek!
Taking time to reflect and breathe during the holidays is so essential to me. It’s why I declared that Christmas Day, we go NOWHERE. It bugs the crap out of my in-laws, but – oh, well.
(Also, N was very smart with the lavender cupcakes – they really offset the green and make the green ones “pop”!)
@Sybil Law, The lavender really was a nice touch. And I love the “nowhere for Christmas” rule.
Eid Mubarak to you all as well! You all look so nice!
Why is it religions create all those rules about food and eating? I find people who need food or are denied a specific type of food become cranky. Why would you want your place of worship full of cranky people? Personally, I am more into whatever I’m doing when I’m not cranky.
@Hockeymandad, People aren’t cranky… they’re happy… besides, the prayer is usually around 9p.m., so it’s not like they’ve missed a huge meal. I know you were kidding, but I actually have noticed that people who are fasting during Ramadan are extremely nice to each other. But that may be because we’re not really supposed to get angry, either.
So wait, the story of Abraham and Issac is in the Qur’an?
I promise that’s not all I got out of the post.
) It seems to me you guys should be sick… or “sick” every year…
@Hamlet’s Mistress, Abraham was asked to sacrifice both his sons.. both Ishmael and Issac? At different times? And both times He was commanded to stop and offered a ram instead? That’s… odd. I would think whichever son was 2nd would be a little anti-climatic. Like “Yeah ok… Where’s the ram? There it is, right on time. Awesome.”
HM
@Hamlet’s Mistress, Hahaha… no in the Quran, Abraham was asked to sacrifice his first born, which was Ishmael. In this way, the stories differ between Muslims and Christians/Jews. Also, in addition to the story of Abraham, the stories of Moses, Job, Lot, Solomon, Jesus and many other central figures in Christianity are also present. There’s a lot more in common than there is different between those books.
@Faiqa,
I wonder which was written first. The Old Testament of the Bible or the Quran. That would be interesting to find out.
@Hamlet’s Mistress, Okay, don’t get mad… but are you joking?
If so, hahaha… very funny.
IF NOT:
Please don’t feel bad that I thought you might be. I guess I shouldn’t assume that people just know this stuff of the top of their head.
SO. ANYWAY. The Torah (Jews) came first… then the Bible, (which as I’m sure you may already know incorporated the Torah as “The Old Testament” and added the “New Testament”).
About 650 years after Jesus, Muslims believe that the Quran was revealed to Muhammad (pbuh) by the Angel Gabriel (the same one in the Bible). Those revelations were compiled into what we now call the Quran within about a hundred years of his death.
In addition to the Isaac/Ishmael debate, the major point of differentiation between Christians and Muslims relies upon the significance of Jesus (pbuh). While (most) Christians believe that Jesus is the son of God, Muslims acknowledge him as a Prophet/Messenger and emphasize that calling Jesus God’s son as antithetical to monotheism. The Oneness of God is a major, if not THE central, point in Islam.
In short, Old Testament, New Testament and THEN the Quran. Muslims believe that the Quran is the last of four holy books (in which the Bible and the Torah are included) revealed as God’s mercy to mankind.
Also? Please know that I appreciate very much that you were willing to ask this question, a lot of people don’t even care enough to wonder.
@Faiqa,
I will be completely honest because I like you so very much.
While I wasn’t joking, I did think that was the order, but I wasn’t completely sure. Just fairly certain. More than anything else I wanted to know what the response would be and you told me way more than I ever knew so thank you for that. I will say one thing in defense of Christianity, it is also a monotheist faith. We believe that all 3… Father – God, Son – Jesus and Holy Spirit are all one. All part of the one single God. He sent part of himself to us in human form… Jesus… to guide and teach and be the ultimate sacrifice and that the Holy Spirit is what He sent to reside within each one of us… to guide while He is not on Earth and to be our comfort and our strength until He comes again… but still all One. The One. Three-In-One.
I have never been more convinced that the hatred between faiths… all faiths… is driven by those in power with the deep pockets who make a fortune off of war… on both sides of the aisle and in all parts of the world and it is them that refuse to allow faiths to see the similarities and only see the differences. If more people were educated in different faiths to not necessarily convert them… but just to understand them, this world would be a much more peaceful place to live.
HM
@Hamlet’s Mistress, Oh, honey, you don’t need to “defend” Christianity to me… I went to a Christian school for eight years, have as much of the Bible memorized as the Quran (which is a significant amount), and my *daughter* goes to a Christian school. I’m aware of the the Christian approach to monotheism and although I don’t practice it, I understand it. A number of my dear friends and even a few family members are Christians, so, yeah… I get it.
That said, I agree 100% with you regarding the hatred being fueled by those in power and their desire to hold onto that. Hopefully, one day we’ll be able to move past that and begin to see each other’s similarities and realize that in the end these faiths when practiced the RIGHT are one way for us to improve the way we treat each other.
@Faiqa,
And also, Happy Eid.
)
@Hamlet’s Mistress, Thank you!
Eid Mubarak, Faiqa.
Interesting. I had no idea of this celebration. And I was reading up on it a little and I understand that in Islamic tradition, it was Ishmael that Abraham intended to sacrifice instead of Isaac. Very interesting. I can’t wait to see my brother-in-law and nephew over the weekend so that they can tell me all about it!
@B.E. Earl, This Eid in Pakistan is commonly referred to “Choti Eid” which means “Little Eid.” I’m not sure why they say that because it’s just as important. But, anyway, it doesn’t surprise me that you hadn’t heard of it… maybe that’s why?
first, what annabell said. happy eid (however i’m supposed to say it) to you and yours.
um. he had to work? i know for christians it’s some random tuesday but the jewish kids in my school always got an extra week off for their holiday at christmas. (this made all of us insanely jealous – who knew additional days off were NOT an acceptable reason to convert?) it doesn’t seem quite fair that he had to go in.
@Ericka, Well, technically, he could have taken off of work. He did take off for Eid ul Fitr (earlier this year), but since we were sick, he probably thought there wasn’t a point. But, yeah, we’ll have to pull the kids out of school when they get older like my parents did for me.
@Ericka, Oh, and thank you for wishing me a Happy Eid…
@Ericka, the interesting thing is that Hannukah, the Jewish holiday which commonly falls during the winter season, is a relatively minor holiday as it was developed much later than the holidays which have basis in the Torah (such as Passover, Yom Kippur, etc.). In fact, while there are prohibitions on working during many other Jewish holidays, going to work on Hannukah is permissible. So as for your Jewish friends getting a week off specifically for Hannukah? We Jews have a specific term for that sort of thing: “lucky.”
@shiny, hmm. this is as i’ve suspected for a long time. mutter, mutter.
It looks like the day was a joyous one. I do hope you are feeling better and I wish you and your family a belated Eid Mubarak!
How come the WASPs don’t have anything nearly as awesome as this?
In any event, it looks like you and your family had an excellent time, and despite any religious meaning for a day, if you don’t have a good time with your family, you’ve missed the point.
@Thursday’s Child, Doesn’t WASP stand for White Anglo Sazon PROTESTANT? Don’t you have CHRISTMAS? And Easter? And … seriously, you guys have lots of stuff. I know because WE get the day off for it.
@Faiqa, I know we have the days. But they don’t mean anything to anyone anymore. They’ve become seasons of consumerism, more than a meaningful celebration of something significant.
Obviously, this isn’t true for everyone, but you know what I’m getting at.
Eid Mubarak to you all.
I was speaking to a Muslim just yesterday and she was explaining all about this celebration to me. You all look gorgeous in the pictures, sounds like you made it into a lovely day even though you were sick, fair play to you Faiqa.
@J from Ireland, Thanks, J. We really enjoyed ourselves.
[...] Very cute [...]
Eid Mubarak to you all as well! Love the pictures and missing you all.
Lotsa love,
Shabina
@Shabina, Mashallah… congratulations on becoming a Hajji!! Can we call you Hajji Shabina, now? No? Okay. SO proud of you, seriously.
@Faiqa,
Seriously, this was one intense week of Hajj. And really NOTHING in the world can prepare you for such an intense experience. It has definitely tested me, humbled me, made me scream, cry, laugh, tested my patience, made me quite angry at times, and lastly made me feel VERY VERY blessed. Most of all, I am thankful that I got to be with 3.5 other Muslims from EVERY corner of the world (young, old, rich, poor, weak, strong). Seeing millions of Muslims performing rites that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) initiated approximately 1431 years ago, humbles you. Seeing old men with bent backs walking briskly energizes you.
Plus, when I sat with the Arab women in the camp at Mina, it reminded me of your previous post of about how women pass on knowledge to other women (that can only happen amongst women). And really, really these Arab women have that aspect down to a science. Literally, they’ll gather around in a circle (young and old), make their Gahwa (Arabic coffee) and discuss anything and everything. During this process, they will either be passing on wisdom to a daughter, taking care of an old grandmother, feeding a baby or bonding after seeing each other after 10 years. Really? An amazing experience to be able to sit with them and enjoy them like this
Anywho, I think I wrote a whole post so I’ll end with Taqaballahu minna wa minkum (May Allaah accept it from you and from us)
Lotsa love and kisses,
Shabina
faiqa and nuha, thank you for making this a wonderful Eid…even though I couldn’t take the day off. Love you both very much.
@tariq, I’m so happy that you enjoyed it. Also, Yusuf helped, too. Why don’t you ever give my baby props?!
You all are so beautiful!!
@Becca, Thank you!
Happy holidays to you and your family. I think it’s great to know that despite your sickness, you and your family still managed to celebrate your holiday with fun and love. Your kids are a darling.:-)
masha’Allah a great post sis
I just came across your blog from Gori Wife Life.. Im a british convert and my husband is pakistani born so I hear some of the things you mention 
this was our first proper Eid together and we had such fun.. being away from family really helps to enjoy it for us 
lol
@Ammena, Thank you, sister, for stopping by and commenting. Hope you had a wonderful Eid!! Love that Gori Wife, btw.
I think Tariq should make his employees work on Christmas in retaliation.
Happy holidays to all of you.
Eid Mubarak. Funny post and I can relate to this as well.
Looks like a fantastic way to celebrate and teach your children about the holiday!
I loved this post. Thank you for sharing so much about your family and your culture and your beliefs here.
And now, here come my arms! *Big internet squeeze.*
there is so much in this post that i should comment on, and i am so sorry i got here late, but i am just blown away by how much i am in love with the suffix pbuh. i sort of want to say it after every name i speak. faiqa, peace be upon her, thank you for sharing so much with us. you are loved.
also, you totally look like a gift from god, a princess in the best sense of the word, in that photo.