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Special Note: Remember how I only posted once last week? Well, that post was syndicated on BlogHer’s site today. Click if you have time, please.
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I’ve been Twittering a lot, lately. Be advised that I have TweetDeck installed on my phone, so if you’re thinking I’m hiding behind my laptop while my children learn to make campfires in the living room, you can just relaaax.
As verbose as I am, I find 140 characters very limiting. Many of my tweets need notations. A Cliff’s Notes version, if you will, where I tell you exactly what I meant that could not be said in those 140 characters.
Let’s get started.
You should know that I’m planning to take over the world. I’m already formulating a system of governance and appointing key figures.
In fact, I have even begun to initiate a devious plan to eliminate possible threats to my supremacy, all under the guise of peaceful cultural exchange.
Aside from trying to take over the world, I’m also fulfilling my role as multicultural guru and political correctness maven.
I’ve also let out my inner snob by making grand and sweeping generalizations about how people choose to communicate.
Notice that I did not say, “THAT alone means they are wrong.”
I said reconsideration.
Our species gets into a lot of trouble over this seemingly intrinsic need to view everything in black and white. If you’re going to support political policies that curtail the rights of certain members of our society, you better have more than a pat little phrase on a bumper sticker at your disposal for a justification. That’s what I meant.
Speaking of Judgey McJudgerson and political polemics, I also tried to get the Internet on board by instituting higher academic standards regarding all those Ben Franklin quotes we’ve been seeing lately. This was surprisingly met with a decidedly negative public outcry.
Or maybe not so surprising because I suggested reading something educational. Oh. The horror.
Look.
I love quotes from famous people. I have them on coffee mugs and bookmarks. I look them up when I’m bored and want to know what Gandhi thought of peanut butter. I assume since he was a good man with a strong heart that he loved it.
However.
A quote from a founding father is not a valid argument for whether or not gay marriage is okay or whether we can avoid molestation at an airport. I had a professor once that put it quite aptly when someone mentioned how they thought Thomas Jefferson would feel about gay marriage, “Thomas Jefferson,” he said, “if he were in this room right now, would be playing with the light switch like a two year old.”
Meaning that those men could not even begin to conceive of the dialogues we are having regarding liberty and freedom. To me, quoting them smacks of political propaganda… in other words, “let’s get everybody all riled up about this issue by invoking the closest thing we have to ‘sacred’ in this country.”
It irritates me even more when someone will quote George Washington, but can’t tell me when the Constitution was ratified. If you’re going to use history to prove your point, you need to respect it and learn about it, too. Then? You can quote whoever you like because you’ve proven with tangible effort that what that person did with their life actually freaking means something to you.
I’m sorry, being an invalid has made me extremely grumpy.
Lest you think I’m just a raging witch on Twitter whose only aim is to make people feel stupid or bad about how they communicate, let me point out that I have been attempting to be productive. Last night, I drafted a post for Buy Her and was trying to find a feature image for a post I was writing. And, then, it all went terribly wrong, and I attempted to save the Internet from soul crushing peril.
See, Internet? I care about you the way your own mother does. I will tell you all the ways you are wrong and then I will save you from soul crushing disappointment. What?! Your mother doesn’t do that? Huh.
Also, I’m not writing a post about Velma from Scooby Doo. That was one of those things where you start out looking for an image that says, “Holiday gifts,” and end up at a photo of a guy wearing nothing but Mickey Mouse ears going over a waterfall in a barrel. Don’t even act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. It’s called “A.D.D.-ing while Googling.” And, yes, it’s okay for me to joke about A.D.D. because I’m very sure I have it.
So.
There you have it: my “Twitter Cliff’s Notes.”
Oh. Wait, wait, wait, WAIT… There are other people who offer deep meaningful contributions to the Internet through Twitter, as well. I follow nearly 450 of them.
Here’s my favorite from this past week:
She’s right, you know.
P.S. Hope you had a very happy Thanksgiving. Mine was so bad, I couldn’t even bring myself to Twitter about it. But, whatever… Im-ma go look at that guy in the barrel, again.
The morning of Eid in my household, whether it’s Eid ul Fitr or Eid al Adha, is a volcanic eruption.
You have to wake up before sunrise.
You also have to take a shower, dress up really nice and, in the case of Eid al-Adha, you should refrain from eating anything before you go to prayer.
If it were just me that I had to worry about, this wouldn’t be a problem. But, given that there are four of us, the phrase “herding cats” comes to mind.
It’s all…
“You get Y. ready., I’ll get N.”
“No, you feed him… ugh, stop pulling on my shirt, what do you want?!”
“Do you have the cash for Saddaqa… seriously, you mean we have to stop by the BANK?!!!”
“No, you CANNOT wear your Cinderella dress up outfit to Eid prayer!”
“WAHFO, WHAAAAFOE… ANA WAHFOO…ANA DADOOO!! (Translation: Waffles, waffles, I want waflles … and I want to nurse!!)
“WHAT do you MEAN you haven’t taken a shower, yet? When am I going to take a shower, then?!”
“It’s Eid… I WANT CANDAAAAAAY FOR BREAKFAST PUHLEEEEZ! ”
“I HAVE the diaper bag AND the clothes we’re wearing tonight, we’ll just have to get ready at mom’s place and then come back here… yes, I did tell you about that party…did you put snacks in there… I know N., the graham crackers aren’t FOR YOU…”
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining. It’s just that amidst that tornado of preparation, I’m not really thinking about Eid.
I’m thinking about getting to Eid prayers, going to my mom’s place afterward, and then how I’m going to blow dry my hair before we start making evening rounds of our friend’s places.
But this is how we do it. This is how everyone does it, I guess. This is how it is done.
Unless Allah blesses you with an upper respiratory infection.
You should know that attendance of Eid prayers is mandatory. There is scholarly discussion of whether it’s obligatory for women, but I, personally, treat it as an obligation.
However, there are exemptions. For example, when you are sick. And your children are sick.
I’m a very civic minded sick person. I don’t go ANYWHERE when I or my children are sick.
Given the fact that Muslims greet each other by hugging and kissing each other, I thought it best to stay home with the kids and thereby save the Muslim community in Central Florida from having an epidemic of the worst.cold.ever.
I woke up on Tuesday morning to find that my husband had already left for Eid prayer. I called him and found out that since we weren’t “really going to be doing anything today,” he had decided to go straight to work.
If you’re reading this and you’re not Muslim, I ask you to substitute your own religious equivalent into this situation. It’s like this, “Since everyone is sick, I’m just going to go to [religious place of communal gathering] and then I’m going to work.”
Don’t get the point? Okay, how’s this… “I’m going to work. On Christmas.”
That? Is incredibly depressing.
As soon as I hung up the phone, I decided… today is NOT going to be another Tuesday.
Today is Eid al Adha.
TODAY IS EID AL ADHA AND IT WILL BE SPECIAL.
So, I woke the kids up, yelling, “Eid Mubarak!! It’s Eid, can you believe it? IT.IS.EID!!!”
This, as I mentioned, is a significant change from, “Wake up, WAKE UP…we’re going to be late, we have to get to salaat… hurry…oh, oh, yes, ::quick hug:: Eid Mubarak… go brush your teeth…”
Y. was ecstatic, because he doesn’t have a clue and pretty much yelling about anything makes him giggle, but I saw N.’s eyes sparkle in a way that they haven’t on any previous Eid.
Even the one when we bought her a bicycle and a golf set. She was excited. Very excited.
“How to Make Eid Special When You’re Too Sick To Go To Prayer and Participate In the Tornado of Socialization that Follows”
First on the agenda, explain the meaning and reason for Eid al Adha, the Festival of the Sacrifice.
Eid Al Adha signifies the end of Hajj and Abraham's willingness to sacrifice for Allah.
Yes. I do realize that those silver balls hanging are supposed to be Christmas decorations. However, I will only cease and desist their use when someone offers an adequate explanation of how tacky silver spheres are connected to the birth of Jesus. Until then, they are pretty, fun, and festive. And since Eid is a festival, I’m using them. Also, you may notice that I wrote “Eid Mubarek” instead of “Eid Mubarak”. Really, you can spell it either way. Mostly, my assertion is based on the notion that I didn’t feel like starting over.
If a person were to take a quick look at most national flags of Muslim countries, they would notice that green and white are big themes. So, our decor was highly informed by that.
You have to eat something sweet on Eid, too. It’s, like, a RULE.
(In addition to green and white, N. has introduced "lavender" (NOT purple) among our family Eid colors.)
And, hello, PRESENTS!!
I got him Avatar. Because I am awesome. And also havent seen it, yet.
Then, after dinner, we read a story about the Prophet Abraham (pbuh*). Not the PG-13 story when Allah commands him to sacrifice his son, but another one that is more PG rated that emphasizes the commitment to Islamic monotheism. Because, personally, I think my five year old isn’t ready for the whole story, and I don’t want her freaking out if I mention a trip to the mountains in the next few months.
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Eid is a day of blessing for Muslims.
It’s a day when we should enjoy ourselves and foster gratitude for those blessings. I think I’d forgotten that. It’s quite possible, in fact, up until a few days ago, I had only understood that in my brain. I hadn’t understood that with my whole heart. This is another one of those moments when I feel blessed to have been born in America. So much of the practice of tradition has the potential to rely on concerted and conscious effort here… we’re given the opportunity to reinvent tradition in ways that can resonate more clearly with the actual values behind the practice.
Whether it’s Eid, Christmas, Diwali, Hanukkah or other special days… the reasons for our celebrations contain the wisdom of ages and the values we hold dear. The true blessings of these days occur when we can actually identify what we’re choosing to transmit to those who will carry them on.
Being part of a community of worshipers is an integral part of being a Muslim, and of course my kids and family will always, God willing, attend Eid prayers and go to the parties afterward. In the future, though, we’re going to take time to… well, to breathe in the blessings that God has given us.
Religious holidays are more than parties and candy and toys… they are blessings.
Let’s stop and close our eyes as these days unfold and truly experience their blessings.
Let’s celebrate with more than just our deeds, let’s celebrate with our hearts and our pure intentions.
It’s not just enough to teach my kids about Eid. I will teach them what it means, why they’re lucky to have it, why it’s important… and, most of all, how they can do more than just observe it…
We will teach them, how they can, truly and with all their hearts, learn to love it.
This is my baby. This is my baby after three cupcakes. Eid Mubarak, everyone. 
Photos were taken with my husband’s Motorola Droid which is the only camera we had available at the time.
*”pbuh” is the suffix that Muslims add when speaking of Allah’s Messengers and Prophets. It means “Peace be upon him.”
P.S. There is no way I’m spell checking this post.
From the monthly archives: November 2010
