This past weekend, we went to Disney and came to the conclusion that our son is a tremendous flirt.  He is not just friendly, he’s an eight month old flirt.  He bats eyelashes, smiles, acts all charming and then starts acting coy once he knows his audience is in the palm of his hand.  His behavior, in my opinion, is a far cry from the normal cutenesss that eight month olds foist on unsuspecting victims.

So, Tariq and I started discussing how this might play into his teenage personality.  Because that’s who we are… big picture people.

I said flippantly, I hope this isn’t going to be a huge problem and he doesn’t try to be some cheesy gel covered Casanova when he’s sixteen.

My husband said, He better not.  He better be a decent human being that respects women, or I’ll <something that may or may not warrant a call from child services>.

I love that about my husband.  That his rules are the same.  A daughter is not required to exhibit any more modesty, decency or self respect than a son.  This is a big deal.  It’s a testament to the way a man should raise a son and a daughter.

Too many times, I see people excuse sloppiness, bad manners, promiscuity or just plain hyperactive behavior citing that, well, he’s a boy, so it’s OK.

No, it’s not OK.

I understand and accept that gender and sex play important roles in child behavior, and I even accept that we must take into account that these factors exist when disciplining our kids.

Still, a value is a value, and if it’s important for your daughter, then it’s important for your son.  In fact, I would go so far as to say that if you cannot raise your son to follow the rules that you may intend to impose on your daughters, then said values are flawed.

He can be a boy and have self respect and respect others.

He can be a boy and put things back where he picked them up.

He can be a boy and make his bed and wash his hands.

He can be a boy and not hit or fight or curse.

He can be a boy and still think about how what he says or does makes other people feel.

He can be a boy and be kind to people and have good manners.

These are not gender specific.

Of course, the boy, per Tariq’s rules, is still not allowed to play with any of his sister’s dolls, but, at least Tariq expects his son to behave within an equal set of parameters as his sister as defined by our personal family values.

What a lucky boy.  What a lucky family.