The problem with sometimes being perceived as a confident or strong person is that people, even those closest to me, will assume that they don’t need to stick up for me.

And they don’t.  I don’t need anyone to defend me.

I can take care of myself, thank you very much.  I have no problem letting someone know when I feel like I’m being mistreated.  And if I don’t say it out loud, my face always betrays me.  Or my voice.

So, I don’t need anyone else to tell the people who place unrealistically high demands on me to back off.  I don’t need help in order to tell someone that they’re hurting my feelings or making me want to strangle them.  I can do that myself.  I’m good at sticking up for myself.

I don’t need it.

But, I want it.

I would like to see someone get mad because they don’t like the way I’m being treated.  Or when they see that completely unrealistic demands are being placed on me.  Or  that someone else is acting with a complete disregard for me or my feelings.

I would like to be able to say, “Calm down.  It’s OK, it’s not a big deal.  You don’t have to say anything.”

And for someone to say in a voice, preferably trembling with anger and resolve, “No, it’s a big deal to me when you’re treated this way.”

I do that for other people.  It doesn’t mean that I don’t think that the people I love can’t take care of themselves.  It means that when I see someone I love feeling disrespected or hurt, I hurt with them.

A perceived wrong to someone who lives in my heart, is a wrong to me.

In fact, it hurts worse.  And I can’t help but say something or do something.

Remember that scene in Dirty Dancing?  When Patrick Swayze walks up to Jerry Orbach and says, “Nobody puts Baby in a corner”?

Yeah.  I want that.